Jesus Is Loving His Church.

Steve Gentry

[0:00] All right, go ahead and have a seat. [0:01] Welcome to Village Church. [0:02] If this is your first time here, my name’s Steve, [0:04] one of the pastors here at Village Church. [0:06] And as always, I’m thankful and grateful [0:08] to see each and every one of you.

[0:09] If you have a Bible, [0:11] go ahead and open it to Ephesians chapter five. [0:13] We’re gonna be starting in verse 29, [0:16] but we’re going to cover really [0:18] the whole chapter this morning. [0:21] Now, what I really wanna talk about this morning

[0:24] is the second commandment. [0:26] And what I mean by the second commandment [0:27] is Jesus said that all of the law and the prophets [0:32] can be summed up in love God with all of your being. [0:38] And so he’s, it’s exhaustive. [0:40] He says that your love of God

[0:42] should overwhelm every aspect of who you are. [0:45] And then he says, the second is like it. [0:48] Love your neighbor as yourself. [0:50] And that is a very difficult command to obey. [0:55] Because it requires two things of us. [0:58] The first thing that it requires

[0:59] is for us to understand what it is to love ourselves. [1:04] That you’re to love your neighbor as you love yourself. [1:07] And so you’ve got to figure out [1:09] what does it mean to love myself? [1:12] But then you also then have to ask, [1:15] what does it mean to love other people?

[1:18] And it all has to flow out of that primary commandment, [1:21] which is to love God with every fiber of our being. [1:26] And so you can believe one thing. [1:29] That if you don’t love God, [1:31] then you cannot hope to love yourself. [1:34] And if you don’t love God,

[1:35] you cannot hope to love other people. [1:38] At least not the way that you were designed [1:41] to love other people. [1:43] And so if you have no love for God, [1:45] or if you are not seeking to build a life [1:48] in which you are truly loving God

[1:52] with everything that you have, [1:53] that means that you do not hold back from Him, [1:56] you give Him everything that you are. [1:58] If you don’t do that, [1:59] you will only be capable of less than love. [2:04] And that is the issue that many of you are struggling with.

[2:08] Is that you are living a life [2:11] in which you are not building the capabilities, [2:15] you are not building the capacity [2:17] which God has created to be in you, [2:21] to know what love is. [2:23] And so you leave a trail of broken relationships,

[2:29] you have nothing but hurt, [2:32] you have contempt for other people, [2:34] you do not believe that love is something worth giving [2:40] to other people. [2:41] So instead you turn it around and you say, [2:44] I measure love by what other people do for me

[2:49] and give for me. [2:50] Have you ever met anybody like that? [2:52] If you haven’t, then you are.

[2:56] Just a fact, Jack.

[3:01] Our relationships tell the tale [3:03] of what we believe about love.

[3:07] And Ephesians chapter five is a chapter [3:09] that’s all about love. [3:11] Now he’s jumping off of Ephesians chapter four, [3:13] and that’s why it’s about love, [3:15] is because chapter four was all about the fact [3:17] that God wants to equip you to make disciples.

[3:22] He wants to equip you by being discipled [3:26] so that you can then turn around [3:28] and equip others for discipleship. [3:30] Disciples make disciples, that’s the point of chapter four. [3:33] Is that you, if you want to be a fully devoted follower [3:36] of Jesus Christ, you will at some point in your life

[3:40] have to go from being poured into [3:42] to pouring into other people. [3:45] So if you are not seeking, [3:48] and I’m not talking about success and failure here, [3:50] you have no control over whether or not [3:52] somebody actually becomes a disciple.

[3:54] If you are not seeking with intentionality, [3:57] in other words, if you’re not ordering your steps [4:00] for the purpose of multiplying your faith [4:03] into the life of someone else [4:05] and teaching them to observe all that Jesus commanded, [4:08] then you’re not a fully devoted follower of Jesus

[4:09] no matter what you say. [4:11] And that’s not my opinion, that’s just what the word says. [4:14] And so if you want to be a fully devoted follower of Jesus, [4:17] you better get to making disciples. [4:19] But then chapter five clarifies that for us. [4:24] Because sometimes we struggle with the notion

[4:28] of being built up, and so what a lot of people will do, [4:31] they will make the mistake, [4:33] they will forsake their own discipleship [4:35] thinking that they’re actually loving other people. [4:37] And so I’m just emptying myself out [4:39] and I’m just sacrificing,

[4:40] and oh, no one should worry about me, [4:42] I don’t need anything, [4:44] and I’m just all about other people, [4:46] which is foolishness, [4:47] because that’s a one-way ticket to just destroy your life. [4:50] That’s just a one-way ticket to trying to prove

[4:52] to everybody how tough you are [4:54] and that you’re good enough [4:55] and you’ve got enough inside of you [4:57] so you can love and you can do [4:59] and you can be all that you can be. [5:01] And here’s what I want you to understand if that’s you,

[5:04] is that nobody’s impressed.

[5:08] Because you are not living a life worth emulating, [5:11] you are living a life in which your audience is not God, [5:15] your audience is other people. [5:16] And the only people that are impressed [5:18] by that type of ethic in life [5:20] are the type of people that are gonna try to one-up you.

[5:24] All right, and so what you’re going to get on [5:26] is a cycle in which you try to one-up somebody else [5:29] and they try to one-up you, [5:30] then you try to one-up somebody else [5:31] and they try to one-up you, [5:32] and you’re both gonna die.

[5:35] So there’s no victory there, there’s no win. [5:39] Ephesians 5 though, hones in to ensure [5:43] that we don’t live our life that way [5:45] because the only type of people [5:47] that can ever really love anyone, [5:50] the only type of people that can ever really please God,

[5:53] the only type of people that can ever truly multiply [5:56] their faith in other people [5:57] are people that know how weak they are, [6:00] are people that know they can’t do it on their own, [6:02] they are people who know that they live life [6:05] under the hand of an almighty God

[6:06] and if they’re ever going to do anything worth doing, [6:09] if they’re ever going to have anything worth having, [6:12] it is going to have to come [6:13] from the power in the hand of God. [6:16] And so here’s what we read, look in Ephesians 5.29, [6:20] because that is the hinge

[6:21] upon which all of Ephesians 5 banks on. [6:23] Here’s where he sums up the point of everything that he says. [6:26] He says, no one ever hated his own flesh [6:28] but nourishes it and cherishes it. [6:30] That’s not a command, that’s a fact. [6:34] He’s saying that even people with low self-esteem,

[6:38] even people that say they hate themselves, [6:40] they don’t really hate themselves, [6:41] everybody is trying to find love, everybody. [6:45] Even people who are living very self-destructive pathways, [6:51] people who are even inflicting harm upon themselves, [6:54] people who struggle with substance abuse,

[6:58] every single one of those people are looking for love, [7:02] they are looking for acceptance, they are looking for joy, [7:05] they’re just looking in bankrupt areas for those things. [7:09] And then he goes on, he says, [7:11] no one ever hated his own flesh, [7:12] you nourish it, you cherishes it,

[7:14] just as Christ does the church, [7:16] because we are members of his body. [7:18] Therefore, a man shall leave his father and mother, [7:20] and he’s using marriage as an example, [7:22] hold fast to his wife and the two shall become one flesh. [7:25] This mystery is profound, and I am saying

[7:28] that it refers to Christ and his church. [7:32] So what he’s saying there is, [7:34] the point of everything is love. [7:37] Everything builds up to love, [7:40] and love builds the church of Jesus Christ. [7:43] And what’s happening between verses 29 and 30,

[7:46] is he’s basically restating the great commandment, [7:49] that’s why I honed in on that. [7:51] He’s saying, Jesus loves his body, the church, [7:56] because Jesus himself wants to be built and glorified [8:00] by all that exists, and so for his own good, [8:04] Jesus nourishes the body, he cherishes the body,

[8:09] he builds the body, and you are the beneficiary of that. [8:14] It has been so misunderstood so many times, [8:16] that Christianity is almost a life of stoicism, [8:20] it is a life of denying pleasure, [8:22] it is this life of just seeking pain, [8:25] because when you are unhappy, God is really happy.

[8:28] And that’s not true, that’s a lie. [8:32] Christianity is the building up of joy, [8:35] it’s just understanding that joy [8:37] comes from very difficult paths. [8:41] The book of Hebrews says this about Jesus, [8:43] the reason that Jesus endured the cross was for joy.

[8:46] The book of Hebrews says that he endured the shame [8:49] of the cross for the joy that was set before him. [8:52] That meant that if he endured a hard path, [8:55] there would be greater joy on the other side of that path [8:58] than if he didn’t endure that path. [9:01] And the reason that some of you do not find love

[9:03] that enjoyable, and you do not find relationships [9:06] worth investing in, and your faith is left wanting, [9:09] it is because you typically take the path [9:10] of least resistance, because you believe [9:12] the easy life is the happy life. [9:15] And you think that, man, if it’s difficult,

[9:17] I shouldn’t give myself into it, [9:19] because the payoff may not be worth it. [9:22] God does not call people to easy paths.

[9:26] If you’ve experienced nothing but easy paths in your life, [9:29] and you’ve taken the path of least resistance [9:31] every single time, then you have not taken the path [9:34] that God has called you on, that much I’m certain of. [9:37] Because to be a Christian is to follow what? [9:39] Is to follow Jesus, and what is the path that Jesus took?

[9:44] Jesus always takes the difficult path. [9:47] The God of heaven stepped down into humanity, [9:49] walked among his creation, was not received well [9:52] by his creation, endured hardship, endured affliction. [9:56] Then he took the path of the cross, [9:58] and I don’t know if you know much about the cross,

[10:00] but it’s not that much fun.

[10:03] It’s a tough path, it’s a difficult walkway, it’s painful. [10:08] But he didn’t do it because he was masochistic. [10:11] Christianity is not masochistic. [10:13] He did it because he knew that on the other side [10:15] of that pain would be joy, and what was that joy? [10:18] The joy was the church.

[10:20] The joy was what if you believe in Jesus Christ? [10:23] You are privileged to be a member of. [10:26] He endured with great sacrifice because of the great gain. [10:30] Faith requires that we trust that even though [10:34] the path God calls us down is difficult, [10:36] it is the path of greater joy, every single time.

[10:41] Every single time, the path of following Jesus [10:43] is worth the difficulty because of the great joy [10:46] that is on the other side. [10:47] Now here’s what I want you to understand. [10:50] The path of loving people is always difficult, always. [10:54] Have you ever met a person?

[10:58] They’re not easy, are they? [11:00] Now don’t look at the person beside you. [11:03] Ooh, that means you’re the difficult one [11:06] if they looked at you. [11:07] Now the thing you need to understand is that people [11:10] will discourage you greater than you will ever

[11:13] be discouraged. [11:15] People can betray you, people can criticize you, [11:19] people can, you tell them something in trust, [11:22] and they will betray that trust, [11:24] and it can be a very tough thing because so often [11:28] we begin without love.

[11:31] And here’s what I mean by that. [11:33] So often we invest in other people [11:36] because we wanna return on our investment, [11:38] and we expect those people to pay up. [11:42] That is the pathway of certain disappointment. [11:45] Why?

[11:46] Because people are incapable of repayment [11:49] to the extent that you believe you deserve to be repaid. [11:52] And so when you look at somebody that you’ve invested in [11:56] and you treat them as someone that owes you something [11:59] because of that investment, you are setting yourself up [12:02] for discouragement and disappointment.

[12:04] Here’s what I want you to understand. [12:05] It’s not their fault, it’s yours, [12:06] because you expected them to give you something [12:09] that only God can give you. [12:11] And people make terrible gods. [12:14] And people will never pay what you believe they owe you.

[12:17] And your expectation of them paying it [12:20] is the problem with your relationships.

[12:24] People are to be invested in by faith. [12:27] If the purpose of my discipleship [12:30] is so that I can invest in other people [12:33] so that they can become disciples,

[12:37] I do that by faith. [12:39] Who is it that repays me for my faith? [12:42] It is God. [12:44] And so when you look to people for repayment, [12:47] you expect them to sit in the seat [12:49] that only God can sit in.

[12:51] It is God who repays us for our faith. [12:54] And this is what makes it even more difficult, [12:58] is that then we can make God a debtor. [13:01] And we can say, but God, I’ve given. [13:04] God, I’ve invested. [13:05] God, I’ve done.

[13:07] I mean, I got up, took a shower, [13:09] brushed my teeth, and I’m here.

[13:12] I should get a good waiter at lunch.

[13:16] You laugh, but you know you do it.

[13:21] And we look to God, and then we make God a debtor. [13:25] That’s a problem, because then you’re God, [13:28] because you’re lording your investments over him. [13:30] Here is the path of relational investment, [13:33] is that you invest in other people [13:36] for the purpose of their discipleship

[13:38] so that they can follow Jesus. [13:40] And then by faith, you believe that the repayment [13:43] will be from God, that repayment will be joy, [13:45] and then you humbly submit to his timeline. [13:49] Understanding that you will make investments in people [13:52] that will never look successful,

[13:56] because they will betray you, they will hurt you, [13:59] they will turn their back on you, [14:01] they will not follow Jesus sometimes, [14:04] but there are some times when in the moment, [14:06] you make an investment, and it is an investment [14:08] that works off, and you see that person,

[14:10] and they follow Jesus, and they love him, [14:13] and you have a great relationship with him, [14:15] and that is a grace from God, and when that happens, [14:18] you should look to God and say, [14:20] thank you for allowing me to see this wonderful picture [14:23] of discipleship and multiplication,

[14:25] but when it does not happen, you humbly submit to God, [14:29] and you say, God, it was an investment worth making, [14:31] because you will repay in your timeline, [14:34] even if it’s not till heaven.

[14:38] And the problem that many of you are having [14:40] in your relationships is that you do not have [14:41] that vantage point. [14:44] You have a vantage point that if you’re going to invest [14:46] in someone now, they better return on it now, [14:49] and then you turn yourself into a loan shark for the Lord,

[14:54] threatening to bust some kneecaps [14:56] if you don’t get repayment.

[14:59] And you’re going to leave nothing but a trail [15:01] of brokenness behind you, personal brokenness, [15:04] and you’re gonna break other people [15:06] because you expect things out of them [15:07] that only God can give. [15:09] What is discipleship?

[15:12] To put it simply, discipleship is growing [15:13] to become more like Jesus, and Jesus never looked [15:16] at anybody and said, pay up, sucker.

[15:20] Jesus didn’t have that type of attitude. [15:23] Jesus continued to give, he continued to invest, [15:26] he was disappointed many times. [15:27] Read the gospel accounts. [15:29] The disciples were not all stars. [15:31] They disappointed him, they misunderstood him.

[15:35] They betrayed him. [15:38] But Jesus gave of himself. [15:41] If you wanna know the path of love, [15:42] we’ve got to look back at verse one [15:44] to understand what he’s getting at here.

[15:49] And Ephesians chapter five, verse one, here’s what we read. [15:52] He says, because of the gospel, [15:55] be imitators of God as beloved children. [15:57] Now in chapters three, chapter four, and chapter five, [16:00] he has similar fashions of the way that he says things. [16:03] In chapter three, he says, I’m a prisoner of the Lord.

[16:05] And that’s the basis upon which [16:06] all of chapter three flowed out of. [16:09] In chapter four, he said, I’m a prisoner for the Lord. [16:12] And that’s what chapter four flowed out of. [16:14] That’s how you get equipped, because you understand [16:16] that you’re just not imprisoned by him,

[16:17] you’re imprisoned to do something for him. [16:19] And then in chapter five, he points and he says, [16:22] you’ve been equipped, therefore go equip, [16:24] and how do you do that the best? [16:26] Well, you try to build a life under the example of Jesus, [16:30] and if you’re following Jesus,

[16:31] you’re gonna try to imitate God [16:32] with everything that you have. [16:35] What a calling is that you imitate God. [16:39] How do you do that? [16:40] First, you understand that God loves you, [16:41] verse one, as beloved children.

[16:44] Then verse two, walk in love as Christ loved us, [16:48] gave himself up for us, [16:49] a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. [16:52] Now, he’s very quick to indicate here [16:54] that walking in love has a destination in mind. [16:58] Walking in love has a destination in mind.

[17:01] See, you can look at the love of Jesus, [17:03] and you can misdefine what love is. [17:06] See, everything that he says about love [17:08] in these short phrases that are very impactful, [17:10] very full of truth, [17:11] lead up to the fact that Jesus’ love

[17:14] was a fragrant offering of sacrifice to the Lord. [17:18] So, Jesus’ sacrifice would not have been loving [17:21] if the ultimate destination of it was not God. [17:25] The reason that we know that Jesus was a loving [17:29] and great example and sacrifice and victor and Lord [17:35] and savior and God is because everything that he did for us,

[17:39] he did ultimately for God. [17:42] Because everything in his life was about pleasing God. [17:46] So, we know that if we live for the ends of every action [17:50] that we make and the motivation for every move [17:53] of our lives is the worship of God, [17:56] one thing that I can tell you, people will be loved.

[18:00] And if it is not for God, [18:03] people ultimately will not be loved. [18:06] Because God has determined that the pathway of love [18:10] will always lead to him, [18:12] and if it doesn’t lead to God, then it isn’t love. [18:16] You have to understand that with your life.

[18:19] To truly love someone, you point them to God.

[18:25] That’s love. [18:26] Anything else terminates on a lesser version of love [18:30] that will ultimately disappoint you [18:32] because it’s pointed in the wrong direction. [18:34] Then look in verses three through 10, [18:35] and I’m not gonna read them,

[18:37] but I wanna sum them up for you. [18:39] What you see in verses three through 10 might seem odd [18:41] because it’s a huge list of commands. [18:44] Don’t do this, don’t do this, don’t do this, don’t do this. [18:47] And so we get confused by those types of things [18:50] because sometimes we separate them out

[18:51] from the context that they’re in. [18:53] And so you might read that list, [18:54] and you might say, I’m doing pretty good. [18:56] I’m avoiding all sorts of mischief. [18:59] None of these things are true of me. [19:01] And it’s just about you.

[19:03] You are obedient, so you are proud of you. [19:08] You’ve missed the point. [19:10] This is not about isolated obedience [19:14] outside of the context of how it affects others. [19:17] Look at the list. [19:18] Sexual immorality, impurity, covetousness,

[19:21] filthiness, foolishness, abusive language, deceptive words. [19:24] These are all pointing in the wrong direction. [19:27] Every single one of these sins is a selfish sin. [19:33] It’s about using other people for your gain. [19:37] And so when he says walk in love, [19:39] he’s saying the life of obedience

[19:41] that you need to exhibit towards God [19:43] is an understanding that when you obey God, [19:46] you love other people through your obedience. [19:49] And if you are guilty of any of these things, [19:51] you do not love people. [19:54] You only love yourself.

[19:56] There’s no love involved in any of those activities. [19:59] It’s not God’s love. [20:01] You see, God’s love sacrifices and endures hardship [20:04] because of the joy that is available in God [20:07] and living to make his love known to other people. [20:10] And you can’t commit those acts

[20:12] if you want God’s love to be known by other people. [20:15] You can’t do it. [20:16] And so the question that you’ve got to wrestle with [20:19] is what are you basing love on? [20:21] What does your life actually look like with love? [20:24] Where are you pointing to other people?

[20:26] Because so many of us, the greatest struggle [20:29] in our relationships is we ask what do I get out of this? [20:33] And right there, you’re not thinking about other people. [20:36] You’re only thinking about yourself.

[20:39] Number two, you have to understand [20:40] that walking in wisdom builds God’s church. [20:43] Walking in wisdom builds God’s church. [20:46] He takes an interesting turn, [20:47] and here’s where our disconnection hurts us even more, [20:51] is that he builds a case for why love is wise

[20:56] and foolishness is unloving. [20:59] He starts that in verse 14, [21:01] where he kind of goes back to the notion [21:05] of Ephesians chapter two, [21:06] because he starts talking about the contrast [21:09] between death and life.

[21:10] In Ephesians chapter two, [21:11] he says that we were dead in our sins, [21:14] but God being rich in mercy with the love [21:16] with which he loved us has made us alive [21:18] together with Christ seated us [21:20] in the heavenly places with him.

[21:22] There is no two greater opposites than death and life. [21:26] They are on different ends of the spectrum. [21:30] And he tells you, starting in verse 14, [21:33] if you have life, you have walked into the light of God, [21:37] and you need to live like it. [21:41] Why can you walk in love?

[21:42] Why should you walk in love? [21:44] Because that is what people with life do. [21:48] All of these lists of things that you should avoid [21:51] are what death does. [21:53] They bring death. [21:55] And if you’re going to bring life,

[21:58] wake up, get up, and walk in love. [22:04] And then he continues. [22:06] And he says this. [22:08] He says, awake, oh sleeper, arise from the dead, [22:10] and Christ will shine on you. [22:12] There’s a promise.

[22:13] He says, if you walk down the difficult path of love, [22:16] you will know the life of Christ. [22:18] That’s a promise from God. [22:20] So who’s going to return the investment? [22:22] God. [22:23] And he continues.

[22:25] Look carefully then how you walk, not as wise, [22:28] excuse me, not as unwise, but as wise, [22:31] making the best use of your time [22:33] because the days are evil. [22:34] So don’t be foolish. [22:37] Understand what the will of the Lord is

[22:38] and do not get drunk with wine, [22:40] for that is debauchery, [22:41] but be filled with the Holy Spirit. [22:45] So he is getting us with this notion [22:47] that loving people don’t waste time. [22:51] Do you want to be a loving person?

[22:53] It’s rare that I find someone that says, [22:55] no, I’d rather be filled with hate. [22:58] Okay, that’s a whole other problem. [23:00] So if that’s you, find me later. [23:03] Actually find someone else. [23:05] But, ain’t nobody got time for that.

[23:08] But if you want to be a loving person, [23:13] which I’m bringing the glad assumption [23:15] that you do want to be a loving person, [23:18] you know what you won’t be? [23:20] A fool. [23:22] Because loving people seek to be wise people.

[23:26] Because loving people requires you [23:29] to make the appropriate investments [23:32] with every corridor of your life. [23:35] Because if you are someone [23:36] that seeks to actually be loving, [23:38] you know a couple of things.

[23:39] You know that to love someone, [23:42] it takes a tremendous amount of time, doesn’t it? [23:45] I mean, you cannot click on on the stopwatch [23:47] and say you got five minutes [23:48] if it’s actually something worth investing in. [23:51] It takes time, it takes resources,

[23:54] it takes energy, it takes all of your mental capacities, [23:58] it takes emotion, it takes effort. [24:01] And so to be loving to other people [24:04] requires more wisdom than you ever knew [24:08] you were going to need to have. [24:09] And that is why the Father was so great

[24:12] and so wise in his love to give us an entire scripture [24:16] for us to know where we’re supposed [24:18] to point our lives towards. [24:20] And in doing that, he’s seeking to build up wise people. [24:25] But if you look then to Ephesians 5, 29, and 30, [24:29] what he’s doing there is he’s saying,

[24:32] this will be the culmination of wisdom. [24:36] You will understand that the greatest investment [24:39] that Jesus makes is in his body, the church. [24:42] Therefore, for you to use your time wisely [24:45] and be the most loving possible, [24:47] you will steward your resources

[24:49] to build up his body, the church.

[24:53] Over and over, the book of Ephesians sums up [24:57] every ethic for life right there. [25:00] And so instead of being foolish, [25:02] you need to use your life in wise ways. [25:05] You need to manage your time well. [25:08] You need to manage your commitments well.

[25:10] You need to ensure that the priority [25:12] of how you invest your life is given over [25:15] to loving like Jesus, and Jesus loves his body, the church. [25:20] So must you. [25:20] If you want to be a wise person. [25:23] And so if you are someone who doesn’t want

[25:26] to manage your time, you wanna waste as much as you can. [25:30] And some of you do. [25:31] I mean, you just gotta be honest with yourself. [25:32] You’re wasting a tremendous amount of time. [25:35] You commit to things that have no one’s interest [25:39] but your own in mind.

[25:41] You aren’t seeking to be and make disciples. [25:45] You aren’t committed to the local church [25:47] more than you’re committed to other things [25:49] that only benefit you in your spare time. [25:52] I can tell you one thing for certain. [25:54] You are not a wise person.

[25:56] Not according to God’s wisdom. [25:59] And you may, by the world’s standards, [26:01] have so much wisdom in so many different areas, [26:04] but remember, the path of real love [26:06] is the path of real wisdom, and the path of real love [26:08] always leads to God.

[26:10] And so if it’s going to lead to God, you have to be wise, [26:13] and you have to invest wisely, [26:14] and you have to use your time right. [26:16] So Jesus’ time is what I have to ask about, [26:19] and what has he spent his time doing? [26:21] Scripture tells me that he has spent all of his time

[26:23] and still is investing in his body, the church. [26:26] He cherishes it, he nourishes it, he seeks to build it. [26:31] If you are a wise person, you will use your time [26:33] for the exact same thing. [26:35] And so we know that the opposite of this is true. [26:37] That it is not wise to not build God’s church.

[26:43] Because if you know what wisdom is, [26:44] you will know what it looks like to be foolish as well, [26:47] and you have to get God’s vision for this. [26:51] If you do not, you will waste your time [26:53] on things that are unwise, things that don’t matter. [26:57] If God says wisdom is found somewhere,

[27:00] we have to go where God wants us to go. [27:04] The main point of everything that God is doing [27:07] is that we need to steward all of our lives [27:09] towards what God says is loving, even if we disagree.

[27:16] Because the last time that the scripture was checked, [27:20] it said that faith is not in you, faith is in God. [27:22] Therefore, he gets to overrule all of your wisdom. [27:27] Everything that you could possibly build up in your life [27:29] to say, oh, this is what I need to use my time for. [27:31] If the Father wants to lead you in somewhere else,

[27:33] and he has, then he will. [27:36] This is why I love kind of social media type stuff, [27:39] because it has made inviting people to events [27:41] so much easier, you don’t have to send letters anymore. [27:44] And I just, I’m lazy, so I just don’t send letters. [27:47] And so you can just make an event

[27:49] and invite 7,000 people to something. [27:52] And what I love is the RSVPs, [27:54] because my favorite RSVP is maybe.

[27:58] Maybe is worse to me than no, [28:02] because no is a solid, they got something else going on. [28:06] Maybe is something else might come up [28:10] that’s more important than you. [28:12] And I’m always like, great, thanks for being so disingenuous [28:17] as to pretend to care about me.

[28:19] But what I love is, is that there’ll be something [28:21] and it’ll be an incredibly important thing, [28:24] and the church is all in and we’re investing in it, [28:28] and we’re all about it, and so we’ll put it out there, [28:30] and somebody, maybe. [28:32] And it’s like, okay, so what you’re telling me is,

[28:34] is that God’s eternal plan, his vision for his body, [28:39] the building of the eternal vision of God [28:42] for his glory in the church, [28:46] something else better might come up. [28:50] And what we have to understand is that all [28:53] of those investments and all of those commitments,

[28:56] and what we will do and what we won’t do, [28:59] and what we will commit to, [29:00] and what we will steward our time for, [29:02] and what we’re too busy for, [29:04] and what we don’t have enough time for, [29:06] every single one of those things tells us

[29:09] what we really love in life. [29:12] And what I want so many people to understand, [29:14] especially parents, is that a parent’s maybe [29:18] will be a definite no in the next generation.

[29:23] And so many of us steward our time towards foolishness [29:28] according to God’s standards, [29:30] and we’re never available for discipleship, [29:33] we’re never available for environments for growth, [29:36] we’re never available for evangelism, [29:38] we’re never available for discipleship opportunities

[29:41] in Bible studies and community groups [29:42] and discipleship groups, and our schedule is crazy [29:45] and it’s hectic, and in all actuality, [29:48] you’re just wasting your time on things [29:51] that God says don’t matter as much as what he’s got going on, [29:56] and I see parents doing it with their children

[29:58] and not understanding that leather balls [30:01] and rubber balls are not as important as discipleship, [30:05] and we’re teaching our children that sports matter more [30:08] than the eternal plan of God, [30:11] because we will say no to their discipleship [30:13] if they get to throw a ball around a field

[30:15] for five minutes.

[30:18] And that is going to pay off in people not loving the Lord, [30:24] because he’s not important enough. [30:27] And we have to be sober to that reality.

[30:33] Speaking of sober, he goes on in verse 18 to say, [30:37] don’t get drunk with wine, but be filled with the Spirit, [30:40] and this is a fascinating section, [30:41] because for so much of my life, I heard that, [30:45] and all anybody ever talked about was the first half, [30:48] don’t get drunk.

[30:50] Now I wanna be clear with you, [30:51] it literally means don’t get drunk, all right? [30:54] So drunkenness is something to be avoided [30:58] according to this passage, [30:59] but just like everything else in scripture, [31:01] I have to ask why behind the what,

[31:02] because he says don’t be drunk with wine, [31:04] but be filled with the Spirit, [31:05] and what do those two things have to do with each other? [31:08] What the apostle Paul is doing here is using an analogy, [31:11] and it’s really low-hanging fruit. [31:13] It’s really low-hanging fruit for you to understand,

[31:15] because he is saying don’t get drunk with wine, [31:17] but the reason he’s saying don’t get drunk with wine [31:19] is because alcohol is something [31:22] that overwhelms your psyche. [31:26] If you get drunk, then you will do things [31:30] you wouldn’t have done sober.

[31:33] Some of you have experienced that, [31:34] and you’re the ones that are nodding to me right now, [31:37] but you will make choices that are totally outside [31:41] of what you thought you were capable of. [31:43] You will act in ways that you would have not been capable [31:47] of otherwise.

[31:48] You can’t walk straight, because something else [31:51] has overtaken your body, and your hands and your feet [31:54] aren’t getting the right messages anymore. [31:56] Your speech will be slurred. [31:58] It is as if an outside entity has come over you [32:02] to the extent where if you drink enough,

[32:05] you will wake up the next morning with the thought [32:09] and a hangover saying what did I do last night? [32:13] Because you don’t remember. [32:15] And so the reason that he specifically uses drunkenness [32:19] as the example is because he’s saying [32:22] that the power of the Spirit should be

[32:26] what overwhelms your psyche. [32:29] You should make decisions because you are under [32:32] the influence of the Holy Spirit. [32:35] Your actions should be dictated by the power of the Spirit. [32:39] Your love should be given because of the power [32:42] of the Spirit.

[32:43] Because of the power of the Spirit, [32:44] you should be capable of loving at a level [32:48] that without the Holy Spirit, you cannot love. [32:52] You need to be under the influence of the Holy Spirit. [32:56] And what that means is, is that you look at this text [32:59] and you just say I’ve avoided alcohol,

[33:01] therefore I’m obeying this. [33:04] Don’t think so fast about that. [33:08] Because alcohol is the example, [33:11] but there could be a number of things other than alcohol [33:13] that you’re under the influence of [33:15] instead of the Holy Spirit.

[33:18] Whether it be power, whether it be fame, [33:19] whether it be money, whether it be drugs, [33:21] whether it be any host of things. [33:24] He’s saying the norm for the follower of Jesus [33:28] is the filling of the Holy Spirit. [33:31] And so anything that takes the place of the influence

[33:34] of the Holy Spirit in your life is what you are drunk on [33:38] and he’s saying walk away so that you can love other people. [33:43] How do I know it’s about loving other people? [33:45] Because the very next verse, [33:46] he says when you’re under the power of the Holy Spirit, [33:48] you will address one another in psalms,

[33:50] hymns, and spiritual songs. [33:52] And don’t get scared if you don’t like standing in circles, [33:55] holding hands, and singing. [33:57] We’re not gonna do that this morning.

[34:01] But what he’s saying is, [34:02] is that when you are under the power of the Holy Spirit, [34:05] the greatest sign of the Spirit’s power in your life [34:08] will be that you are filled with praise for God [34:11] and you are seeking to aid others [34:12] to be filled with praise for God.

[34:15] It’s disciples making disciples [34:17] and that is what the power of the Holy Spirit does. [34:20] I see so many people that want the power of the Holy Spirit [34:23] but you don’t know what it looks like. [34:25] You think it must be some kind of sensational act. [34:27] You think that it must be some kind of out of body

[34:30] experience and you’re like, [34:31] man, I hear about the power of the Spirit. [34:32] I see what he’s saying about the power of the Spirit. [34:34] But what do I need to do to get the power of the Spirit? [34:37] Here’s what I want you to understand. [34:39] If you are seeking to grow in your faith in Jesus Christ

[34:43] and give of your life for the discipleship of other people [34:46] so that you can walk in love [34:48] and make the investment in other people [34:50] and use your time for the purposes of God [34:54] and steward your resources for the purpose of God, [34:56] there is no other power other than the Holy Spirit

[35:01] that will lead you to do that. [35:03] And so if you are living that type of lifestyle, [35:05] you are experiencing the power of the Holy Spirit [35:09] and if you are not living that type of lifestyle, [35:13] I don’t know what power you might be experiencing [35:15] but it is not the power of the Holy Spirit.

[35:20] The power of the Holy Spirit will make you more loving.

[35:24] The power of the Holy Spirit will make you give [35:28] more of yourself for the cause of other people [35:30] because the Spirit will continue to refill [35:34] what you are pouring out. [35:37] Therefore, if you are not growing [35:39] in your love for other people,

[35:41] if you are not growing in the amount of time [35:44] you invest in other people, [35:46] if you are not growing in the amount of time [35:48] you invest to build the body of Christ, [35:50] here’s what I want you to understand. [35:51] You’re not growing in your faith

[35:53] and you’re not experiencing the power of the Holy Spirit [35:55] no matter what sensational sign you think you might be [35:58] getting or however much money might show up [36:01] in your bank account next week. [36:03] Because the Holy Spirit is not about those things. [36:04] The Holy Spirit is about empowering you to love others.

[36:09] Walk in love.

[36:13] Don’t waste your time. [36:16] You have to ask yourself, [36:17] what would the Spirit direct me towards? [36:21] And I think it’s a very simple question [36:23] because the Spirit would always direct us [36:25] towards making more disciples.

[36:28] Every single time. [36:30] If you’re saying, what is the will of Lord for my life? [36:33] And the end of the matter of how you answer that question [36:36] does not involve making disciples. [36:39] You did not find the Lord’s will in that sentence. [36:43] His will is always to multiply your faith

[36:46] in the lives of other people. [36:48] So anything that would take you away from that lifestyle [36:53] is not the will of the Lord. [36:56] And so sometimes we ask, what would God’s will be? [36:59] I’m making more money. [37:01] Wait a second, I’m hearing something from the Lord.

[37:05] Yes, that’s his will.

[37:09] Sometimes we don’t hear the Lord, we hear cash registers. [37:12] And we just say, it’ll make my life easier, so I’ll do it. [37:16] Now I’m not saying the Lord’s not gonna bring you [37:18] financial gain in your lifestyle, [37:19] but what I’m saying is that’s never the point. [37:21] The point of God’s will is always loving people.

[37:24] It is always making disciples. [37:25] It is always taking the gospel further inside of you [37:29] and into the lives of other people. [37:32] That’s the point of 19 through 21. [37:34] Note what he says in verse 21. [37:35] He says, submit to others out of reverence for Christ.

[37:39] Submitting to one another. [37:41] It’s an interesting concept that we usually only focus [37:44] on the first phrase of. [37:46] Submit to one another and we try to qualify [37:48] the mess out of that, don’t we? [37:50] Well, how much submission is too much?

[37:53] Well, how much submission is required? [37:55] Well, what if somebody does something that’s not nice? [37:58] Am I just supposed to be a doormat for other people? [38:00] See, all of our responses to that are typically selfish. [38:03] Where we try to protect ourselves. [38:06] The second half is the only qualification

[38:08] that God wants us to worry about. [38:10] We submit to one another, why? [38:12] Out of reverence for Christ. [38:14] We walk the pathway of Jesus Christ. [38:17] A lot of us want to say we’re followers of Jesus [38:19] until Jesus walks us down the same path that he walked.

[38:23] Jesus poured so much of himself out. [38:26] Jesus made himself so open to the lives of other people [38:30] that they killed him. [38:33] And so when you try to qualify how much of yourself [38:37] you need to give to other people [38:39] and then follow that with I wanna follow Jesus,

[38:42] the answer is you give of yourself to other people [38:45] to the extent that Jesus gave of himself to other people [38:48] if you want to follow Jesus. [38:51] The key thing there is some of you want to say [38:53] be your followers of Jesus, but you are not prepared [38:56] to walk the path that Jesus walked.

[38:59] It is a path that will cost you much [39:01] but will always have great gain on the other side. [39:04] Don’t waste your relationships. [39:08] But instead, number three this morning, [39:09] build relationships based on the love of Jesus. [39:12] Build relationships based on the love of Jesus.

[39:17] Verse 22, he begins to jump off of verse 21 [39:21] and understand that verse 21 is the theme [39:24] of chapter five, verse 22 all the way [39:27] to chapter six, verse nine. [39:29] What he does is he says submit to one another [39:31] out of reverence for Christ

[39:33] and then he uses a series of relationships [39:35] to serve as an example of what that looks like. [39:38] He first uses marriage, then he uses the relationship [39:42] between parents and children, then he uses the relationship [39:44] between servants and masters. [39:46] All of them going from the most intimate to less intimate.

[39:51] But the purpose is that he’s trying to show us [39:54] what it looks like to actually love other people [39:56] the way that Jesus loves. [39:57] And the reason he starts with marriage [39:58] is because it’s the most significant relationship [40:00] of your life, at least it’s supposed to.

[40:03] Marriage should be the most intimate relationship [40:05] that you ever experience in your life. [40:07] It’s supposed to be that way. [40:08] If it’s not, then you’re doing it wrong. [40:11] You’re doing it totally wrong. [40:12] And he begins by talking about the way

[40:14] that these relationships are supposed to be ordered [40:17] because he wants your relationships [40:19] to be based on God’s design rather than your thoughts. [40:23] A lot of us look at the design of God [40:24] and then we try to insert our philosophy. [40:27] Then we try to insert our excuses.

[40:29] We try to insert our experiences. [40:31] We try to insert our hangups. [40:33] We try to insert our baggage. [40:35] He says, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ [40:38] and what that’s doing is that saying Christ is God, [40:41] therefore the way that Christ designs relationships

[40:43] is the way that I’m supposed to live out my relationships. [40:45] Therefore, if Christ is God, wives submit to your husbands. [40:50] He’s saying wives follow. [40:52] Then he says, husbands lead. [40:54] The examples that he uses is the design that God has. [40:57] He says, wives, you are to serve as a revelation

[41:01] of the church of Jesus Christ. [41:03] And the way that the church submits to Jesus, [41:06] wives are supposed to submit to their husbands. [41:07] Now husbands, you are supposed to lead your wives [41:10] the way that Christ led his church. [41:12] And so what I hear so often is the wives will say,

[41:16] well, he doesn’t give me an example worth following. [41:18] And the husband will say, well, no matter what I do, [41:20] she won’t follow. [41:21] You’re both wrong.

[41:24] Both of you.

[41:27] Your marriage doesn’t exist for you. [41:33] So stop putting yourself as the center point.

[41:40] Your marriage exists for God. [41:45] That’s what Jesus is saying [41:46] when he gets to verses 29 through 32, [41:48] especially if you look at verses 31 through 32. [41:51] He restates the book of Genesis. [41:52] He says, a man shall leave his father and mother

[41:55] and he will hold fast to his wife. [41:57] And he says, I am saying that this mystery is profound.

[42:02] In other words, you can miss it if you’re not careful. [42:07] I’m talking about Christ and the church. [42:10] Your marriage serves to live as a testament of the gospel [42:14] to people who don’t believe the gospel [42:16] and people who do believe the gospel. [42:18] Your parenting is to serve as a statement

[42:21] about the gospel to everyone. [42:23] Children, your relationship to your parents [42:26] is to serve as a testimony about the gospel. [42:30] When you go to work, how you function with your coworkers [42:34] and your boss in our culture is to serve as a testimony [42:37] of what we believe about the gospel.

[42:40] What he’s saying in every one of these scenarios [42:42] is that every relationship in your life [42:46] is about the gospel, [42:47] so stop seeking to steal God’s thunder.

[42:54] And when you look at other people [42:58] and you say, I’ve invested in this person [43:01] and they’ve disappointed me, [43:02] people aren’t worth investing in. [43:05] You’ve missed it.

[43:08] You’ve missed it. [43:10] And when you say, I won’t invest in people [43:13] because nobody’s investing in me, you’ve missed it. [43:18] When you say, I don’t have enough time [43:20] to invest in people, you’ve missed it.

[43:25] So many times I see people come into the church [43:29] and I’ve seen it so many times over years.

[43:33] They come into a church and they’re looking [43:36] for who they can get something out of.

[43:40] And so they find somebody and they’re like, [43:41] oh my goodness, this person is wealthy, [43:43] I wanna know how to be wealthy. [43:44] Or this person has influence, I wanna have influence. [43:47] Or this person knows how to cut their grass the right way, [43:49] so I wanna know how to cut my grass the right way.

[43:50] It can be any number of things, folks. [43:53] And so you go to that person and you just take [43:54] and you take and you take and you take [43:56] and then when you think you’ve exhausted those resources, [43:59] you push them behind you and you go to the next person [44:01] that you think you have something you can get out of them

[44:03] and you take and you take and you take [44:04] and you throw them behind you [44:05] and then you take, take, take, go behind you. [44:07] And then you go to somebody and you thought [44:08] you had something to learn from them [44:09] but you find out they’re a big dumb dumb.

[44:11] And then you’re like, I have nothing I can get from you [44:12] so get behind me so I can get to the next person. [44:14] And behind them is a trail of broken relationships [44:18] because you’re just in it for yourself. [44:20] And here’s the warning that I have for you [44:22] if that’s you repent because you are not a follower

[44:25] of Jesus Christ.

[44:28] Some of you are just looking at how much life [44:31] you can suck out of other people [44:33] to make you feel better about you. [44:38] That’s not faith and that’s not love. [44:41] And you need to stop it for the sake of your soul. [44:45] Stop looking at other people as a means to the ends of you

[44:51] and begin to look at other people [44:53] as people whom the Lord loves, [44:56] therefore I love, therefore I will invest, [44:59] I will seek to equip, I will hope to disciple, [45:03] and then I will wait on the Lord to return [45:06] on the investment because that person

[45:08] isn’t the one who can make the return on the investment [45:11] because my faith isn’t in that person. [45:14] And the one who gives me significance, [45:16] the one who equips me, the one who makes me a person [45:20] with love worth giving is only God.

[45:27] Eventually my great fear of those [45:29] who are leaving a wake of broken relationships [45:32] because you jump from one person to the other [45:34] not caring how that affects other people [45:38] is that it’s going to bleed you dry.

[45:45] And I want you to have a life [45:49] the way that God intended for you to have, [45:51] but my fear is is that you just won’t listen [45:54] because you are so self-absorbed.

[45:57] The pathway of love is a pathway of selflessness [46:03] because it is the pathway of Christ.

[46:07] Christ gave and he gave and he gave and he gave his life. [46:12] And here’s the key because some of you hear that [46:14] and you say, but I’m broken, I’ve been left in the wake, [46:19] or the reason that I do that is because I tried [46:21] to do it the other way and I was hurt and I’m broken [46:24] and I just don’t seem to be able to be healed.

[46:26] And that’s why communion is so vital in this scenario.

[46:32] Because communion represents ultimate brokenness. [46:35] That’s what I want you to understand. [46:36] When you look at the tables around this room, [46:38] you will see on that plate, you will see broken bread [46:41] that represents the broken body of Christ. [46:44] You look in those cups and you will see the analogy,

[46:48] the juice is the shed blood of Jesus [46:50] where he shed his blood and he gave his life. [46:53] And every week you walk up to this table, [46:56] you have nothing to give him. [46:59] Do you know that?

[47:01] You have nothing to offer God. [47:05] You have nothing that he’s looking at you saying, [47:07] I could really use that. [47:10] Now when you come to that table, [47:12] you come as a broken person. [47:15] And so if you’re here this morning and you’re broken,

[47:19] welcome. [47:20] If you’re here this morning and you’re tired, welcome. [47:25] If you’re here this morning and someone has hurt you, welcome. [47:30] If you’re here this morning and you do not believe [47:33] that you have a life worth having, [47:36] you came to the right place.

[47:38] And if you are a follower of Jesus in just a moment, [47:40] I want you to bring your hurt, [47:42] I want you to bring your brokenness, [47:44] I want you to bring your pain, [47:45] I want you to bring every single reason that you have [47:48] for why you aren’t making disciples,

[47:51] why you aren’t investing in people, [47:53] why you are sucking the life out of some people [47:56] with no intention of ever making a disciple. [47:59] If you’re a follower of Jesus, [48:00] I believe you’re capable of that sin [48:02] and I want you to bring that sin up here this morning

[48:04] and I want you to take in your hand the bread [48:08] because that’s the brokenness of Jesus Christ. [48:12] He was broken so that you can be made whole. [48:17] And I want you to take the cup [48:19] and I want you to see the shed blood [48:23] because he took all of that pain and he shed his blood

[48:28] so that he could give you his life. [48:31] And I want you to eat and I want you to drink [48:34] and I want you to go and I want you to love [48:38] and I want you to live and I want you to make disciples [48:41] under the power of the Holy Spirit [48:43] and I want you to realize that when you do

[48:46] this, people are going to hurt you, [48:49] people are going to discourage you, [48:51] people are going to betray you, [48:53] people are going to give you pain [48:55] and that’s why when you come in here next week, [48:57] there will be more bread, there will be another cup

[49:00] because Jesus has broken himself to the extent [49:04] where you will never exhaust his broken body [49:08] to the extent where it can’t make you whole. [49:12] His mercies are new every single morning. [49:16] You will never exhaust his capability to fill you. [49:22] And so every week when you come up here,

[49:24] you bring whatever you have [49:27] and he will give you all that he has. [49:30] And he will do it again and he will do it again [49:32] and he will do it again. [49:34] And I want you to understand that the reason he gives [49:37] is so that you can love.

[49:41] Faith will return on its investment [49:43] but only God will make the return. [49:46] If you’re a follower of Jesus, [49:48] come to the tables in this room [49:50] and celebrate the death of our King.